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Mental Abuse

it's 19 Jul, 2024 7:34 pm

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Mental Abuse


This information is about the specific health area mentioned above. It comprises a combination of textual and video information, on our site and on external sites.  We will be adding new specific health areas and further information continually.

The idea is for you to understand more about the health area you are addressing before you get too far building your action plan.

General Information

What is mental abuse, exactly? The short answer and clinical answer are the same: mental, psychological, or emotional abuse is a type of abuse where one person exposes another to some type of behavior that causes psychological trauma. Emotional abuse can create traumas that change the way you think, feel, and behave.

Mental (or emotional and psychological) abuse is sometimes not as obvious as physical abuse. It can have an enormous impact on your self-esteem and self-worth. It can leave you feeling anxious, worthless and even depressed, and it can be equally as harmful as physical abuse. While the person using abuse might never have physically hurt you or your children, emotional and psychological abuse is no less serious than physical violence and abuse. No matter how normal it may seem, emotional and psychological abuse is not acceptable, and no one deserves to experience this abuse.

Background Information

There is information available which will help you formulate your action plan – both on our site and on external sites.

On our site


MindDrive is about the mind and mental health. There are some points in about people who might be causing you mental abuse.

We have relevant information on MindDrive

StressDrive looks at when you are under pressure, and some causes

We have relevant information on StressDrive

On external site(s)

If you’re not sure whether you’re suffering from mental abuse, then this article from WebMD might help. It covers:

  • What is mental abuse?
  • Signs of mental abuse
  • Dealing with mental abuse
  • Support and resources


Healthline have an extensive article on How to Recognize the Signs of Mental and Emotional Abuse



Sometimes the owner of a video will not allow the video to be played on external sites.  If you see the video is unavailable on the left just click the ‘WATCH NOW’ link on the right and the video will play in a new window.

Men Talk About The One That Got Away

Refinery29 have an article on The Sublety of Emotional Abuse.

This short video is very disturbing – it starts with the premise: It can be painful to lose the one you love. And even more painful to leave the one you love. Men share their stories about the one that got away.  It’s almost sweet and sad.

However, it turns dark.


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In order for you to assess what you know about this health area, we suggest using a questionnaire. This might help you understand your situation in this area, or taking it might improve your understanding of the area.

You may be able to take this questionnaire online – either here on our site or on an external site – or download it and complete it on paper – it depends on copyright (and whether we’ve managed to build it on our site!).

The ways you can take a questionnaire:

Questionnaire on our site

Take Questionnaire on our site

You can take a questionnaire on our site. This will score the questions automatically and give you a summary showing what your score means.

You will see our questionnaire first, possibly followed by a tab which may contain a second questionnaire (see above).  If you scroll down you will see links to external questionnaire(s) or downloads if there are any. Scroll down until you get to the right place for you!

Our Questionnaire

These 15 questions are used in DV assist and in other related questionnaires – this scoring is slightly more detailed than some.

The following two-minute 15 question questionnaire may help you identify whether you might be in an mentally, emotionally or psychologically abusive relationship. Please note the quiz is provided as a guide only and should not replace seeking professional advice.

Welcome to your Types of Debt Questionnaire.  This questionnaire is from DebtCamel; we found this to be the most informative questionnaire in terms of explaining the different types of debt, and also what their impact is.  This information is reproduceable under the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International (CC BY-NC-ND 4.0) license, which means we can use it in its original form without making changes.

This applies to someone living in England, Wales or Northern Ireland. The same general diagram (shown below) may apply in other countries, but the types of debts, the timescales and credit recording may be very different.

Is that debt is a priority? Could you get a CCJ for it? Why isn’t it on your credit record? If you have problems with your debts, it helps to understand why different debts sometimes have to be handled differently.
Getting one wrong could be a big mistake!
Here is a quiz, seeing if you can place some debt examples into the right place on the diagram below. Whether you think you are a debt expert or it just looks confusing, have a go… The answers page explains what goes where and why.

What sort of debt do you have?

A brief (no legal jargon!) explanation of my four terms:

  • Priority = a debt that is important, because something bad can happen if it’s ignored.
  • Legal = any debt where there is a balance unpaid.
  • Enforceable = any debt where you may be taken to court and are likely to lose.
  • On credit file = any debt of yours that is showing on any of the three credit reference agency records.

What are the eight different areas?
Some combinations are impossible – all priority debts are enforceable in court; all enforceable debts have to be legal debts.
But the following combinations are possible:
1. priority debts which are not on your credit record
2. priority debts which are on your credit record
3. Non-priority debts which are enforceable and on your credit record
4. Non-priority debts which are enforceable but not on your credit record
5. legal but non-enforceable debts which are on your credit record
6. legal but not enforceable debts which are not on your credit record
7. on your credit record but not a legal debt
8. not in any of the above groups.

types of debt

Below is a list of debts (A-W) that all belong somewhere on the diagram – but in which section?

A) Council tax arrears from last year.

B) Three year bank loan taken out a year ago.

C) Credit card you defaulted on seven years ago where you have been making token payments ever since.

D) British Gas debt from a house that you left eight years ago.

E) Letter from a debt collector about a Talk Talk account which isn’t yours.

F) Credit card debt included in a Debt Relief Order that started six months ago.

G) Your PCP car finance that you are up to date with.

H) A bank loan from 2009 which you stopped paying four years ago, where the debt collector can’t find the Consumer Credit Act agreement.

I) A credit card you haven’t paid anything to since you defaulted nine years ago.

J) Your mortgage.

K) A catalogue debt you defaulted on two years ago and paid in full last year.

L) Unpaid income tax.

M) Current electricity bill which you can’t pay.

N) Your overdraft

O) A 4 year old bank loan you settled with a full & final settlement last year.

P) Money you owe a builder.

Q) Mortgage shortfall from when your house was repossessed in four years ago.

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R) Bank loan you repaid on time five years ago.

S) Child maintenance that you owe.

T) HP on a car which you voluntarily terminated last year.

U) “Buy now, pay later” deal on a microwave from Littlewoods.

V) Payday loan debt from 4 years ago – you went bankrupt two years ago and were discharged one year later.

W) Credit card account opened ten years ago and managed with no problems for seven years. Now in an arrangement to pay (or DMP) for three years.

Thanks to DebtCamel for producing that questionnaire, which as we said is the most informative we found on debt.

If you are feeling completely lost, talk to a good debt adviser. They will help you sort out which your priority debts are and help you get a plan for your whole situation.

Priority debts, whether they are in section 1 or 2, all need to be sorted – getting a proper repayment plan in place – before you deal with non-priority debts. See What debts and bills are top priority? for more info.

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A Butterfly Life: 4 Keys to More Happiness, Better Health and Letting Your True Self Shine

Times of change can be a challenge, no doubt! Whether it’s a relationship breakup, job loss, or being diagnosed with a serious health issue. Or you may WANT things to be different, but it feels a little scary or overwhelming. The butterfly reminds us change can be beautiful, even necessary, in order to realize our full potential and live our best life.